Ok, now, tomorrow we should have our intake with Centerstone.  I am really needing some prayers about this because I feel like I have been tossed around and put through the ringer just to get someone to help my precious children.  Finally I feel we are getting somewhere.  Maybe it is not very fast but one more step is good.  We have a case worker to help us with the school and we are signed up to get them into therapy where maybe we can actually start working on this the sensory needs and high anxiety.  And if someone recommend medicine for my 7 year old to deal with the pressures of 1st grade one more time I WILL SCREAM.  So, we are heading the right path though and it doesnt inclued medicine.  It includes getting to the root causes of these issues and dealing with them head on.  Lord, let it be.




Intake for Micah and Anna to have play therapy is coming up next Monday.  I have to keep reminding myself it is a slow process and will help them over time, not immediately.  They are both growing up so much.  They are doing great.  There are some things I believe a play therapist can do to help them absorb some of the lessons of life’s obstacles better and to increase their ability to learn well.

I would really have liked to continue using the mobile therapy for Micah.  His therapist was able to work with him after school at home where he has the most difficulites in self-control.  But our private insurance ironically prevents the use of the mobile therapy unit (it is for TN CARE only patients).  I have been upset about this fact, but I am trusting our God to let all things work for the good in this situation.  I know HIs desire is for Anna and Micah (and their family) to be holy and sanctified.  He desires our obedience rather than what we think is best.

I can compare our reactions in circumstances to Anna’s recent tempertantrums.  She has been defiant, yelling and fussing, refusing to follow directions, and telling Grandpa she doesnt like him.  All she wants is to be with Mommy.  She wants to jump on the bed, kiss me, love on me, be in my face.  Then she turns around and refuses to get down when I manage to tell her to get down.  My voice aches from the tonsilectomy.  It makes me mad that it takes so much work and pain to ask her to get down then she refuses to do so.  Most of the time, that mean ole Grandpa is there and he physically removes her from the bed so I can rest again.  But isnt that so much like my relationship with God.  He knows the pain and trouble things cause and yet I keep fighting for what I want over and over.  I refuse to accept things the way they are because I want it to be better, brighter, nicer, cooler, easier.  I am an early childhood specialist and I should know that mobile therapy is what my child needs, not the insurance companies.  but then, there is God, who patiently waits for me to turn to Him, knowing I would get to this moment, and smiles when I say “not my will but Thine be done”. Just like Anna when it suddenly clicks and she says sweetly “yes maam.”

God made my children afterall.  He is the one who established our home and brought them into it.  He is the one who made their genetic origins and designed their specific chemical makeup.  He is the one who breathed the breath of life into their very lungs.  He is the one who died to redeem them.  He is their real Father, their real adoptive Father.  How could I ever think that He would not provide the best counseling and advocates for these little ones who He entrusted into our care?  I know that there are times He expects me to be that advocate, that voice for them, and i have been several times already.  He laid it on my teacher’s heart to look into therapy for them.  But now, God expects me to be patient and to watch Him move.  He will let me know when I need to do something.

Monday, we will go to Centerstone for the intake of play therapy.

Developmental Medicine

We finally had our appointment with a Developmental Behavioral NP.  She evaluated Anna in the doctors office and listened to our concerns for 2 hours and came back with several recommendations.

I admit, I had imagined this to be an end all be all trip.  The Doctor would say the reason for all the aggression, senosory disorders, and defiance was because something small such as her left foot was slightly crooked and with a perscription of physical therapy to work on the foot, all would be corrected.

Unfortunately, there is no “fix”.  We were encouraged that she is improving because her sensory issues are much more tame than they were at one point.  She has learned to help herself with her high sensory needs, plus pre school gives her much needed imput.

Andrew was such an encouragement to me by pointing out that this was another step in our process to help our daughter grow into the wonderful compassionate young lady we know she will be.  It is not the end of our search for advocates or therapies or testing.  It is another step.

A great step, that provided us with an new road to travel.  We may be in touch with mobile therapies where a counselor or therapist can work with us in the house. Or we may just keep monitoring her progress right now while we implement the strategies we have learned through occupational therapy and now through the Developmental Medicine Practice.

Depvelopmental- Behavioral Pediatrician

When did i last update on our minor special needs? After I found out about this kind of Pediatrician from the Resource Center at Vanderbilt? I have called in a referal to get an appointment. Today I was told that if the concerns are only Sensory Perception Disorder then they would refer me to an OT instead of putting me on the waiting list for the Developmental Pediatrician. Ahhh! Something kind of flipped in me. I told this lady who probabably has no authority whatsoever the whole long story and explained my fear of getting stuck going back in circles. She said my primary care physician would need to send a referal and they could fax it to her. But way back when i first had concerns I spoke to the primary care physican who recommended TEIS/ Early Intervention/ and remember the R.I.P? That got me at least into the OT in the first place which has been helpful but there is a long way to go. There are still many concerns even after more than a year of therapy. So, I called the PCP to put my updated concerns on record for when she gets the fax. I am hoping for an Aspergers’ test and behavior wise I would like a doctor who seems to know what the heck is going on. I am not one to blame behavior on other things- people are responsible for their actions, period. But I know, call it mommy instincts or whatever, that there is something that makes it harder for my sweet girl to control her actions and I would think in our culture people would be fighting to diagnose her with some crazy affliction that can be her get out of jail free card (or maybe I’ve just watched too much Law adn Order). That is not the case though. In the mean time, while we wait for a diagnosis, we will continue to teach her to control her actions as best as we can and we will love her with all that we have. We are so blessed that God entrusted her to our care adn we will fight with her to get her the top help available.

play therapy

Play Therapy is a method of psychotherapy in which a child’s fantasies and the symbolic meanings of his/her play are used by the clinician to understand and communicate with the child. As the child plays, the clinician recognizes themes and patterns that are expressed in the child’s play. Children communicate their thoughts and feelings through play more naturally than they do through verbal communication.  Play is a natural medium for children to express feelings, solve problems and build skills. Children’s play can uncover their internal conflicts, bring to light negative communication patterns in families, and help children discover new problem-solving techniques and strategies. – taken from the evelyn frye center website

I learned about play therapy first in college where it seemed like the most wonderful, natural, perfect idea in helping children through difficult situations.  Now, as a parent I am confronted by the reality that there are limited resources that can actually help my child with sensational needs or her brother being bombarded with those needs.  The Evelyn Frye Center sounds great except i cannot go there because of my children’s not so exceptional insurance that was provided by the state. 

This leads me to search my heart desparetly because of my stance against more government regulation accompanyied by the truth that there are people out there with limited resources to spend on the limited resources available who despararately need play therapy or other therapies more than even my own family does.  What should be done? Seriously… I am asking… 


mild crisis

These are thougths on my sweet girl with sensational needs.  I am waiting on a return call from RIP.  its the region intervention program where my dr’s office and school system have initially refered me too.  I am not too impressed with the name…but after reviewing the website last fall I found that it seemed like it would teach basic managment techniques, which i guess i let pride get in my way.  I said, i spent 4 years of college learning child and family science, behavior management techniques, why? so i could have me own daughter attend a program with the same acronym as rest in peace because i can’t manage her behavior?  Beyond the pride, her Occupational Therapist (who is the first and only one yet to agree wholeheartedly adn make the diagnosis of sensory perseption disorder) cautioned me about participatiing in the RIP program incase she were to learn new, worse behaviors to try out.

The past couple of weeks have shown me though that her impulse control is not improving and it has been a rough thing for her older brother all along who prays most nights for her to not be mean anymore.  And, her lack of impulse control has set me on edge recently and i have not always responded the way i know she needs me too.  Something has to be done.  I want to specialize in helping families in crisis, but i am also trained enough to know the our family is quickly moving to a crisis point itself.  So, i called a counseling service i found on the internet who refered me to RIP!

I have left a message with them for more information.  But i have also left a message with the kid’s dr saying that i need some referels to someone who can counsel the brother of a special needs child, and someone who can counsel the special needs child and her family!

Doing research i have found