“Lord forgive us when we get consumed by the things of this world, that fight for our love, and our passion.
As our eyes are open wide and on you,
grant us the privilege of your world view,
and may your kingdom be, what wakes us up, and lays us down.”
I have listened to this song by Toby Mac over and over the last few weeks. He sings about not wanting to gain the whole world and lose his soul. Several thoughts in the song seem to put my own feelings into words. “Father God, I am clay in Your hands. Help me to stay that way through all life’s demands cuz they chip and they nag and they pull at me, and every little thing I make up my mind to be. Like I’m gonna be a daddy whose in the mix and I’m gonna be a husband who stays legit and I pray that I’m an artist who rises above the road that is wide and filled with self love. Everything that I see draws me, though it is only in You that I can truely see that it’s a feast for the eyes- a low blow to purpose and I’m a little kid at a three-ring circus.”
I feel this way when I walk through the grocery store, or even through lifeway. There is so much stuff everywhere and even in Christian stores it is all marketed to entice. But the circus is more than just stuff. I want to be clay in God’s hands when it comes to being a mother and a wife. Life’s demands do chip and nag until the road that is wide and filled with self love seems enticing. I get tired of the tempertantrums and the misunderstandings. I become selfish and want what is easy or makes me feel better. But, I remind myself that my purpose and self worth is found only in God’s unselfish love, which reminds me of another song- this one from the Newsboys: “I surrender all to the promises You made, and I will give it all to the Maker of today…He doesn’t love us cuz of who we are, He only loves us cuz of who He is.” And He is great.